Choosing to Be Navigated by Him
I entered the office of the head of the science department. As the door shut behind, little did I know so did my opportunities. I put my hands over my face as two professors of the program sat there and gave me the unfortunate news.
They handed me a page with the courses I’ve taken in the past three years. As the digits began to populate the page, my heart sank and agony filled my mind. I knew it, I thought to myself. It was too good to be true. In an instant, I was sinking. In just one second, I went from knowing what my next step in life was going to be to thinking of how I’m going to reverse the past few years and get a different degree.
The past three years have been a season of struggle. A season of wrestling with God. A season of growth, yet still a season of setbacks. Grit + Virtue said it best, “As uncomfortable as they can be, these are the seasons that show us what we’re made of because of Who we’re made by. These are the seasons where we have the opportunity to choose. Do we keep our eyes on Jesus and trust that he can help us navigate the waves? Or do we fix our gaze on the circumstances around us and settle with sinking?” We serve a God of possibilities. When we’re incapable and too weak to keep going, our God promised us that when only when we rely solely on Him, He would lead us into great unknown. As I look back, this season was filled with doubt and fear. It was and continues to be frightening. It’s like I’m too far out into the ocean, but I’m too far to go back and too far to see the island at the other side. When we’re sinking, it’s easy to get dragged down into the depths of doubt, fear, and darkness. It’s easy to automatically try and swim on our own. But the longer we struggle to stay afloat, the closer we are to drowning. And when that moment comes, it’s when we should remember that we must “offer these things to the One who is not only giving us the ability to walk on the water, but also wants to take our heavy burdens”. Our God is a God of love. He is a God who cares and who is genuinely saddened when we constantly reject Him when His arms are reached out, ready to catch us. When we go through troubled waters, we often get caught up in asking God, ‘why did you let me go through this? Why didn’t you change my circumstances?” God doesn’t bring us into the middle of the ocean to watch us sink. And he definitely does not smile when we struggle. He brings us out into the depths of the sea so that though we struggle, God is glorified. Through the miracle of us walking on water, He is praised. “Looking within, instead of up, for the solutions to our problems only leads us to worry, a subtle sin that can result in entangled feet and a halt in forward momentum…. If there is a thought or a feeling that causes us to doubt the goodness or capability of our God, we’d do best to be proactive and throw it off. There’s a good chance that those things are what’s giving us that sinking feeling.” After the meeting yesterday and after realizing my fate, I realized that the only choice I had was to keep moving forward. Regardless of where we are or what we’ve been through, we must ALWAYS keep moving forward. Walking on water means choosing persistence when things don’t work out the way you hoped it to. Walking on water means choosing to put one foot in front of the other when a mistake puts us further behind than we feel like we should be. Walking on water means trusting that He who promised is faithful, and He is more than capable of seeing us through. God promises more than we could ever imagine. But the thing is, we’ll only be able to see and experience such things if we completely surrender our hearts and our futures to Him. If we choose to believe that He is far greater than any circumstances that we find ourselves, and that He will navigate us through the deepest waters, we will find ourselves overwhelmed with joy. “I’m choosing to believe that He’s capable of keeping me from sinking. What about you?” Love,
Cheya *Inspired by Grit + Virtue